I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
