I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
i now understand why vodka
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize
