you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
