Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
