are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
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