Me too!
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
