What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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