I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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