Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
i believe in u and ur pee
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
