Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
