Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Randomize