Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I think I have vodka in my lungs
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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