her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
