PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Randomize
