its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
