It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Randomize
