Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
