Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Naked Twister starts at high noon
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Randomize