it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
even my farts smell like vagina
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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