If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
we're making bets on your personal life
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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