I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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