in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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