fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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