worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
