Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize