No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
