I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
