I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
