escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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