I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
