I'm drive I can fine osifer
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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