the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I booty called her while she was in labor.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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