i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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