The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
