I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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