did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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