When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
