No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Holy shit dude........stairs
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
