Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize