I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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