Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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