I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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