How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
