I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
a search helicopter?!
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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