I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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