It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Randomize
