i don't plan on having that self control this summer
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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