some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize