I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
