dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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