Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
