Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
