he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
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