And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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